what i got for xmas

when i was a kid we were left alone a lot. most days of the week involved getting into a brawl with my older brother that resulted in a bunch of black eyes and more then a handful of hospital visits for broken bones and stitches. no idea how poor mom handled it


now that i'm older things are different. this year the family decided to have a rare get together for the holidays. i was shocked as shit when my brother handed me a $100 gift card. don't remember the last time we exchanged presents, if ever. felt bad for a minute that i didn't get him anything. so the next day i rolled over to the home depot to get some free stuff. dude runs the card and in that voice says "declined sir, zero balance". my brother is a smart deviant bastard. fucker got me